What a beautiful morning. The temperature is refreshing after the hot days of summer. It is cool outside these doors. Passing through the front door the sun warms the skin and shines brightly in a sky made bluer than usual with its absence of clouds. The depth of color lightens to a pastel shade as it comes to rest upon the multicolored treetops. The lake spreads out before me, sparkling a welcome for a bracing swim in its receding warmth left over from summer's intensity.
Yes. I think I will. With that I strip away the confines of warmth and plunge through the mirrored surface. There is warmth retained, but it is still a shock to the system. I break the surface and let out a hoop. The center of the lake beckons and I swim toward it.
The tension of the week begins to wash away with each stroke. I had skipped the morning shower ritual to step out into the world on this bright morning so felt, too, the grime of the past day slip away. So refreshing, I thought, to glide along in this clear mountain lake and have the layer of yesterday physically slide away--nature's loving touch to renew.
I swim without thought other than the feelings rising and falling with the rhythm of the overhand stroke. The lake's placidity was disappearing with unnoticeable but deliberate change. Slowly it began a counterclockwise movement. I continued to swim toward the center.
Each time my hand dipped into the water to pull forward a layer of grime dissolved into the surrounding water. I began to notice the circular movement of the water when I lifted my head to check my direction. The shore I had left was no longer behind me but to my left, the distance farther than my limited swimming ability would allow. Undertow I thought. It might be a good idea to return now.
I turned to the shore spotting my clothes heaped along the sand. Hmmm, that's farther than I thought. I pull harder with each stroke and each time I look up the shore is in a different direction. Now I see my clothes angled to my right. What gives? Two more strokes. Lifting my head I see nothing familiar so I stop and look behind me. They are there but moving away from my sight...I'm moving in a circle here. The circular movement has become very obvious. I look to the center of the lake to see the beginning of a funnel dipping into its center as if the plug were pulled. The water rushes around me pulling me more rapidly in the counter clockwise. I notice my body has begun to dissociate. Not only has the dirt and grime of the past day floated out into the huge body of water but my substance has begun to float away. No pain, no anguish, it's as if the glue that holds this package I call me had begun to dissolve like so many sugar molecules loosing themselves from the central cube dropped into a cup of coffee.
Afraid? No, just fascinated with the process. I watch as I begin to mingle with the water. Molecule by molecule I detach and float into the middle of the funnel at the center of the lake.
The lake is placid again. I have begun to accept my dissolution. I'm part of this huge body of water. Another component still conscious of who I was, who I am, but even that begins to slough away memory by memory.
Oh, look. There's light creeping into the overhead. I hope I reflect it well. It feels warm.